Saturday marked the annual Phillies Photo Day at Citizen’s Bank Park. Since I was a girl of 13, I’ve been attending this time-honored tradition of watching ball players begrudgingly take photos with nagging, sweaty fans in the 90-degree heat. And guess what? It’s a damn good (and often hilarious) time.
Thanks to our punctuality, we were able to score a coveted position at the rope so our pictures would not be obscured by jutting and clawing fan extremities.
Rather than use my typical verbal rainbow to describe the event, I have decided to employ a more concise photo account and appropriately so.
Let’s begin.
JC Romero tries to make peace to rectify his horrible season. I accept the picture and subsequently shun his peace offering.
Jayson Werth feels every bit the ladies man… or dies of embarrasment. This is hard to ascertain due to interference by Phanatic snout.
“Something tells me the people of Philadelphia are going to need me today.”
Jimmy Rollins shows up on time for Photo Day and is rewarded by actually getting to play in the game. Jimmy Rollins is happy. Good job, MVP!
Pat Burrell doesn’t wear a wedding band and therefore feels he is entitled to a boob grab. Vote for Pat!
Sooo Taguchi. Sooooo confused.
Adam Eaton was last seen posing half-heartedly for pictures at Citizen’s Bank Park on Saturday. He is 5′10, 185 pounds, dirty blonde hair, and blows most of his major league starts. If anyone has any information on his whereabouts, please contact Unsolved Mysteries.
*Update*: Thanks to our Unsolved Mysteries viewers, Adam Eaton has been located in the minor league system.
Shane Victorino employs the slapping-down-the-line strategy to avoid any picture requests. Smart man, that little Hawaiian.
Boo? Fuuuck you.
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This sums up our hour and a half of photographic harrassment.
After a disappointing outing by Cole Hamels, sending our initial lead plummeting to a 9-3 score, the infamous offensive rally and solid closing by Lights Out Lidge led the Phillies to victory by a score of 10-9.
Likewise, my 7-hour stay at the park led to second-degree shoulder burns that are unrelieved by aloe vera. But I took one for the team. Thanks, Phillies!
